"No One Else Can Play Your Part"

November 10. World Suicide Prevention Day.

In this day and age, depression and self-harm are incredibly common. According to To Write Love On Her Arms (or TWLOHA), a leading organization fighting these diseases, more than 350 million people suffer from depression worldwide and 9.7% of Americans suffer from mood disorders (such as depression). The website also states that between 14 and 24 percent of youth have self-harmed at least once, with suicide being the third leading cause of death for Americans between 15 and 24.

These statistics are high. Too high. And there are ways to help. I can guaruntee that each and every one of you have met someone that is suffering from depression, or has in the past. It is something that can plague even those that seemingly have everything together. For example, yours truly. It's something that was present in my life through high school, and still causes some problems today. And, as afore stated, 9.7% of Americans have the same issue as I do.

Depression is hard to explain. Some days it can be crippling, making it virtually impossible to even get out of bed. But most days, it's just a nagging feeling in the back of your head. Something feeling slightly off, being the tiniest bit distracting, yet not completely tearing you down. But it is always there.

If you are struggling with depression, you are not alone. Reach out to me, to a close friend, a parent, a sibling--I was scared to say anything for a long time. I understand not wanting to feel like a burden. But you aren't. People love you and people care. Chances are, people already may even have a hunch. So go ahead and talk. Let it out. And if you aren't quite ready to talk about it, write it down. I am a firm believer in writing everything down. As Anna Nalick so aptly puts it in her song Breathe (2 a.m.), "If I get it all down on paper it's no longer inside of me, threatening the life it belongs to."

Today was created for a very specific reason: to help those that feel the most alone and let them know that they aren't.

If you are one of those feeling alone, take today to feel less alone. You are loved, you are important, and you are going to do great things. Never forget that.

If you aren't, then take today to reach out and show your love to someone. Maybe you know that they are struggling, maybe you don't But either way, we all need to feel loved. And today is the perfect day to express that.

Thanks for following along on my journey, and for taking the step to be brave for yourself and for someone else. Love you all.

Carpe Diem

Generally, celebrity deaths don't hit me too hard. With the exception of Mr. Rogers, I'm not sure that I've even ever cried over one.

But today, that certainly changed.

My favorite movie is "The Dead Poets Society." It made loving books and English feel cool. Less of a nerd. Made poetry more acceptable. I mean, Walt Whitman, HEY. But what really made the movie was Mr. Keats--or, Robin Williams.

In the movie, he pushed his students to embrace literature--and furthermore, to embrace themselves. No adolescent is good at that. But Mr. Keats pushed his students to do so.

In Aladdin, we saw Robin as the kind-hearted Genie, tending to a poor boy in love with a princess. Here, he carefully guided Aladdin (in his own way), and goodness did he make us all laugh.

There are countless other examples of how Robin Williams affected myself and so many others, more than I could hit in this single post.

Today, this world lost a wonderful comedian, actor, and man. It is so sad to see him go, especially given the circumstances.

I'm not sure what there more there is to say on the matter...rest in peace, Robin. You will be sorely missed, Captain.

O Captain! my Captain! our fearful trip is done,

The ship has weather’d every rack, the prize we sought is won,

The port is near, the bells I hear, the people all exulting,

While follow eyes the steady keel, the vessel grim and daring;

                         But O heart! heart! heart!

                            O the bleeding drops of red,

                               Where on the deck my Captain lies,

                                  Fallen cold and dead.

O Captain! my Captain! rise up and hear the bells;

Rise up—for you the flag is flung—for you the bugle trills,

For you bouquets and ribbon’d wreaths—for you the shores a-crowding,

For you they call, the swaying mass, their eager faces turning;

                         Here Captain! dear father!

                            The arm beneath your head!

                               It is some dream that on the deck,

                                 You’ve fallen cold and dead.

My Captain does not answer, his lips are pale and still,

My father does not feel my arm, he has no pulse nor will,

The ship is anchor’d safe and sound, its voyage closed and done,

From fearful trip the victor ship comes in with object won;

                         Exult O shores, and ring O bells!

                            But I with mournful tread,

                               Walk the deck my Captain lies,

                                  Fallen cold and dead.

Rooted

I find it funny that I am writing on this topic when it is the theme for Ligonier Camp this summer (where I worked last summer as a counselor). But, it is appropriate and therefore it is what I will write about.

Now, first, sorry that I have been so M.I.A. Life has been crazy and my mind has been spinning with the work that I am doing and the things that I can do in Louisville with the wonderful friends that I have made. But, I felt as though I didn't have too much to say. Not worth an entire blog post, anyway!

However, I now have something that has been on my heart and mind for a long time now, and I think that it's time to write it out. That's what writers do, after all.

I have spent the past week back at Westminster covering the New Wilmington Mission Conference. I had never been to it, but now here I am totally changed by it.

When I came, I was excited because I was going to be back at Mother Fair and because I was going to get to write about missionaries--I love missionaries. I have always thought that was the coolest job, and kind of wanted to do it.

But, as I spoke to them and thought more about where I am in life (and voiced it to a few of them in the process), I found myself thinking, "So you think this is a cool job--why couldn't you do it?" And the more I thought about it, the more I began to say "okay."

The nudges have been happening for a very long time. Sort of like the nudges toward seminary that I've gotten for forever and a day, this is something that has been on my heart. But, I always had my own agenda. I think, after this week, I'm finally ready to listen to GOD's agenda instead. Because let's be real--God knows what I need to do more than I ever will. Something that we all need to remember.

So why does this relate to being rooted? At a first glance, it doesn't. I want to travel. I'm not the best at staying in one place, as anyone that knows me can attest to. I am always moving, be it tapping my foot or heading to a new place to live for a few months. So how could I possibly be rooted?

Well, here's how. My roots aren't in the ground. They aren't in a singular person, or a group of people. They are in God, who knows me and my heart better than anyone could ever try. God will guide me, and as long as I remain rooted in that I will be fine.

This realization of my call to mission is scary. Who knows where I could end up, for how long, doing whatever. But at least it's there. At least I know, and at least I know that I can use my love of people and my great and wonderful God in that way--while still writing (as I so love to do).

Anyway--that is what has been on my heart and my mind. Thank you, as always, for going with me on this journey. Bless you all.

Pigs and New Friends that I'm Pretty Sure I Knew in a Past Life.

Yeah....so my title basically sums it all up, and I have no shame in it. But I guess since I've been MIA for a little while, I should elaborate. SO, here goes nothing.

First off, work. I love my job. I've said it before, and I will absolutely say it again: I LOVE my job. This whole writing/editing/social media thing? Right up my alley. I could do it for the rest of my life, and totally intend to. Heck, I'd skip out on the rest of school and just stay here in the 'Ville if I could!!

...just kidding Mom, Dad, and WC friends...

But really, it's been amazing. I'm working on some really great stories, and have some really amazing opportunities up ahead of me. So that's pretty fantastic, and I'm super happy about it.

So, when I first got to Kentucky I was super nervous about, you know, making friends. But I've been really lucky. Not only have I made some super awesome friends at work, but I have friends from this super snazzy new worshiping community that I've been sucked in to...Sweaty Sheep, I'm looking at you. This ministry is too cool, they are essentially a bunch of athletes! Runners, swimmers, cyclists...and YOGA! We have fun, and lots of it. I hang out with some of them so much, it's unreal. And I want to shoot a special shout-out to Tavi, their intern...I'm truly positive she was my best friend in a past life. We balance each other out splendidly and have fun no matter what the circumstances--including getting lost at the expo center and wandering through rows upon rows of giant pigs. Yes, pigs. It was something else, lemme tell ya.

Other things that I've done with Sweaty Sheep: help to host 31 college students that are currently biking across the country. They started in Rhode Island and are on their way to Cali!! They are biking to raise money for Habitat for Humanity, it's a really cool organization! Something I would definitely want to do...summer after I graduate? Heck yes. It was quite the event, involving a trip to the bike store with one of the guys because his bike broke, sleeping on a one person mattress with Tavi (while using a giant stuffed animal sheep as a pillow and a prayer shawl/snuggie combination as blankets), and waking up at 4:30 am to feed the cyclists before they got back on the road. As crazy as the night sounds, we had a lot of fun and I wouldn't have wanted to spend it any other way.

Alright, well, this week is slated out to be fairly busy, so I'm sure I'll have some stories soon. Thanks for walking with me on this journey, love y'all!!!

A Peaceful Opinion Piece

If you (on the off-chance that you don't read the paper/watch the news/haven't seen my Facebook) haven't noticed, a lot of big stuff has been going on in the Presbyterian Church (U.S.A). And when I say big, I mean REALLY big.

The first of these things is that according to a new Authoritative Interpretation of our Book of Order, pastors in gender equality states can now marry same-sex couples. Additionally, a decision is now being sent out to be made by each and every presbytery: whether the wording in the Book of Order ITSELF should be changed so that it is not so gender-specific. These decisions have been discussed (or, more likely, argued over) for years now, and the church has finally made the decision to move forward with this.

It is my personal belief that these decisions were made well. I'm aware that many will disagree with me, and that many more will be leaving PC(USA) as a result of this. And that is saddening to me, as I love all that are within this church equally. However, if they believe that it is time to go, then I will send them in peace and with prayer. On the flipside, it brings me great joy to know how many more people will feel truly welcomed to the PC(USA) family as a result of these decisions. May the wedding bells ring for all!

The other big decision made was to divest from Caterpillar, Inc., Motorola, and Hewlett-Packard due to their involvement in the violence taking place on the West Bank between Israel and Palestine. This decision was also made after much discussion and discernment, with committees working year round to determine how to handle the situation.

The final decision, to divest from these companies, was made in an effort to pull ourselves out of the violence and be on the side of peace. It is INCREDIBLY important to note: WE ARE NOT DIVESTING FROM ISRAEL.

I REPEAT: NOT DIVESTING FROM ISRAEL.

PC(USA) is divesting from companies that are knowingly providing tools that implement the violence between Israel and Palestine. There is a very big difference. It is also important to note that we are not doing this to hurt our Jewish brothers and sisters. This part was especially painful for me, as a half Jew. Ultimately, I decided that divestment would be best. I love Israel, but I hate to see both countries battling and know that the PC(USA) is helping fund it by it's investments. There are many conflicting sides on this, and I was (and am) nervous about how this will affect interfaith relations. I can only pray that all will be willing to sit down and discuss, sit down and listen, sit down and pray--together.

I can only imagine that some will disagree with all that I have to say here. That's fine, I don't expect everyone to have my views. I only ask that if you wish to talk about it with me, or anyone else with a different opinion, that you do it peacefully and with respect.

For now, I think I'll be going. These past 10 days were exhausting, and I need to reboot before I head back to work. Sending love and prayers to all. As always, thank you for following me along this journey.

It's a Wild Ride

For the first time since arriving in Detroit, I am in my hotel room before midnight. This is beautiful. But, even though I am off duty, I am here to tell you about my time on duty. Quite frankly, that is probably a good thing--I could use a small debrief and period of reflection, and this is the perfect time for it. So, here goes nothing. An overview of the past three days of the 221st General Assembly through the eyes of a communications intern. Buckle your seat belts, folks. It's a wild ride.

Okay, now, when I last left off, it was Saturday and almost time for the Moderator's Election. Oh my goodness, was that a crazy night. All those involved--commissioner, delegate, staff person, and onlooker alike--were stressed and freaking out, there is no denying that. The internet at Cobo, the convention center, was crashing on a regular basis, the new voting system AND old voting system failed, leaving the vote to a hand raise from delegates and paper ballot from commissioners and a very late night for everyone.

However, on the oh-so-bright side, I got to see my dad! We grabbed dinner and got to chat and catch up before needing to run off to the election. It was wonderful to see him--I miss my family! Never being home can be a little weird after a while.

On Sunday, I was pleased to look at the paper that is printed each day for the Assembly (the one that I am writing for), and find my story ABOVE THE FOLD on the first page, with translations in Spanish and Korean on the back!! Such a cool thing to see!

However, life got crazy fast. My friend Sara (from work) and I were planning to attend a Korean service with my dad. But, we were informed just before the bus was to leave that it may not return in time for plenary, which Sara and I both needed to be at. So, we opted out of that service and ended up at Fort Street Presbyterian Church of Detroit. Talk about the Spirit moving us--that service was absolutely awe-inspiring. I am so glad that we ended up there. It featured beautiful music, speakers of various faith traditions, solid scripture usage, and a wonderful sermon on the miracle of Pentecost (They have turned Pentecost into a season at Fort Street Pres., rather than merely celebrating it for one Sunday. I think it's brilliant.) The sermon argued that the miracle of Pentecost was not one of tongues, but of ears. She related it to present-day, where the miracle of Pentecost is seen in the listening of those with different beliefs and ideas than your own. It was a refreshing and new message that I feel resonated a lot with what the church is currently experiencing. How timely!

After church, I wrote up a quick blurb on it for the paper while splitting a 20-piece McNugget and large fry with Sara (talk about true friendship) before we rushed off to Cobo for plenary. While there, the two of us were on social media accounts (her: a million; me: various Presbyterian's Today accounts) so that we could tweet, post pictures, and otherwise alert the world of the goings-on in our General Assembly. 

Then, today. Oh, today. It began with waking up at 5:30 am, getting to Cobo by 6:45 to cover a talk at 7, then run to a meeting at 9, and get to my committee for 9:30. And in my committee room I remained ALL DAY...goodness, did it feel good to move around when I finally got up to get dinner at 5:45. Then, after a quick dinner, I was right back at it.

Newspaper writing is the very definition of multi-tasking, I’m finding. Especially in this setting. I found myself writing 3 different stories and taking notes on what was happening in committee, as well as managing social media stuff, all at once. It was a little crazy, but all that needed accomplished was done to my taste, and I was happy.

After committee let out, around 9:45, I grabbed the YAADs of Committee Eight and managed to interview them for a story for Presbyterian’s Today before they headed off to their YAAD Gathering for the evening. It worked out beautifully, and now my day is finally over. What a lovely feeling that is.

Alright, now that I've given you an all-intensive backstage tour of the 221^st General Assembly Newsroom Intern life, I’m going to head to bed before doing it all again tomorrow. As always, thanks for joining me on the journey. 

Journey to Detroit--Complete!

Greetings from the grand ol' city of Detroit, Michigan!! For those of you that don't know, I'm here for the 221st General Assembly of the Presbyterian Church (U.S.A.).

As it is my job, I should tell you...if you want to follow the news stories from GA go to the news page for PC(USA). And if you want to find stuff on Twitter check out #ga221 or @presbyGA and @PresbyNews. AND pictures can be found through @presby_news on Instagram. So there's that...end PR rant.

Now, as some of you may have seen, my trip to Detroit was a little more eventful than would have been preferred. Of course on my first big solo trip, my luggage was lost. OF COURSE! But, my clothes have finally caught up to me and life will go on. And, for better or for worse, I got to do some shopping in Detroit to get a few clothing items so I wasn't stuck in the same things for more than 48 hours. But, c'est la vie!

Since I've been here, I've written two stories (both this morning) as well as helped out at the Young Adult booth in the exhibit hall and met up with old friends. There is a saying that GA is like a family reunion, and it is so true. Many people that come to GA come more than once, and so many faces end up being familiar after being at a few. It's been great to see people, especially when they pop up with their cute new babies!

Alright, time to go for now...it's almost time for the Moderator Election, and I'm on Twitter duty. As always, thanks for following me on this crazy journey!